Mai, Ek Porn-Star (1)

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Jab Ishaak ne muje call kiya..
to fon uthane se pehle, maine 6-7 rings bajne di.
Ab, jab ke maine apni Porn-career ko khatm kar diya hai,
toh meri shaame aisi hi hoti hai.
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Mai apni eReader aur whiskey se bhare glass ko lekar porch me baith jata hu,
magr padhne ya peene ke bajaay, mai nadi ki aur ek-tak dekhta rehta hu,
aur muje kuchh nahi pata, ke meri life ka aage kya hoga.
Pichhle ek hafte se Whiskey ki ek bottle bhi khatm nahi huyee hai
aur eReader ka wohi panna teen dino se pura nahi hua..
haan, battary jaldi puri ho jayegi uski. 
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Koi aage kar bhi kya sakta hai apni life mein..?
jab ke except kapde utaarne ke, aur kuch aata hi na ho usey..
agar aata hai to sirf apni gaand matkana,
aur apna bhim-kaay lund kisi amir bachche ki gaand me ghusana..
aur woh cheeze bhi ab, woh agar aage nahi kar payega,
toh uska kya hashr hoga?
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ek career..jo ke 30 saal pe khatm ho jaati hai..
ek product..jo ke achchi tarah tarasha hua tha,
woh ab un-used, un-wanted hai,
uski 'sell-by-date' expire ho chuki hai.
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Pichhli baar, mai jab studio gaya, kuch kaam ki talaash mein..
toh..
toh unho ne muje 'shape-up' hone ko kaha
aur kaha ke-
-tum ko kuch paise tumare looks par spend karne chahiye..ye lo visiting card..
-kiska hai..? kaun hai ye ?
-Plastic Surgeon. Agar tum uski achchi chudaai karoge, toh woh tumhe kuch discount bhi dega.
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Ek porn star ki life kaafi short aur hopeless hoti hai.
magar duur se, woh kaafi interesting aur inviting lagti hai.
Pichhle 8 saalo mein, agar muje kuch malum tha to woh yeh,
ke agla shoot kabhi hai..
agli DATE..sorry, agla encounter kiske saath kahaa hai,
agli party, agla week-end kaunse middle-age bande ke saath hoga,
jo ke muje aur mera time afford kar sakey.
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Aap sochte honge ke yeh hindustaani ladka (?) waha USA mein kaha pahuch gaya..
khair..
toh yeh 'maherbaani' hai meri 'pyaari' mom ki.
Uus nadaan aurat ki..
jo apna career banane yahaan bhaag aayi, ek brazilian bande Pedro ke saath.
Tab mai 14 saal ka tha.
Aur muje saath iisliye lekar aayi, kyu ke mai ladka tha..
agar ladki hota, toh mere mein interest lene waale kai log mil jaate
kuch daam bhi mil jaate.. aur pichha bhi chhut jata..
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khair, uus bechari ka bhi koi kasoor nahi tha..
woh to chaahti hi nahi thi, ke uski kokh se koi paida ho..
chaahti kya, woh toh jaanti tak nahi hogi, ke 'aisa' karne se bachcha paida ho jayega..
aur agar jaanti bhi hogi, toh usko koi knowledge bhi toh nahi hogi,
ke kis tarah bachho ko avoid karke bhi, 'mauj' kaise kari jaay..
khair uski 'mauj' ki toh baat hi kahaan hai..?
yeh to uska compromise hoga..mumbai mein apna career banane ke liye..
woh career..woh sapna...
bollywood ki heroine ban'ne ka,
jisko pura karne, woh 16 saal ki umar me hi bhaag aayi thi, apna chhota sa gaanv, apna pariwaar, sab chhod chhaad kar.
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kiske saath ?
woh to, woh khud hi jaane..
career toh bana nahi..
shohrat toh tapki nahi uski jholi mein,
oh yeah, ek bachcha jaroor tapak pada uski gode mein,
na jaane kaise..na jaane kahaan se..
aur haan, na jaane kis'se..
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Ab iis mein uus bechari ka kya kasoor?
kasoor toh mera tha..jo uskey palley pad gaya,
aur uska pallu pakad pakad kar uskey pichchey ghumne laga..
aur uske career ki 'vaat' lagaane laga..
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aise haalaat mein agar ek indo-american film mein, junior artist ka role karte waqt, ek dusra brazilian junior-artist, usey hollywood ke sapne dikhane lagey,
to kaun taiyyar nahi hoga, India ki dojakh-bhari zindagi chhorne ko?
Aur woh bhi tab..
jab ke woh Brazilian nau-jawaan Pedro, uus teen-aged ladke ko bhi saath le jaane ki arrangement kar sakta ho.
uusne toh khair, muje yahaan India mein hi 'dispose-off' karne ki koi koshish nahi kari..
kyu ke ussey mai achcha lagta tha..
ya fir kuchh saalo ke baad 'achcha' lagne wala tha..
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Toh iis tarah, ham aa gaye yahaan, Los Angeles mein,
Nahi..pehle toh ham Brazil gaye..
kyu ke yaha par visa milna kaafi complicated tha..
aur Brazil mein kaafi aasaan
waise bhi woh uuski home-country bhi toh thi,
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Fon ki ring bajti rahi..
aakhir maine 'hello" kaha.
aur suuna, ke saamne Ishaak tha.
Abhi bhi utna hi active.
Approximately meri hi umar ka,
abhi bhi handsome,
uska chehra kitni saari websites par chamakta hua..
uska lund abhi bhi waise hi pre-cum tapakta hua
aur uske muscles utne hi bhare bhare, ubhre huve.
iis country ka sabse khubsurat mard, (at least meri nazro mein to hai) apni maadak aawaz mein bola -
" I need your help, oh fuck man,.I need your help."               (contd...)
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